Bonnie Lang

Supporter

Age: 25 (She was 22 when her husband Mike Lang was diagnosed)
Hometown: San Francisco, CA

Biography

Although I’ve never had cancer, I have experienced so much walking alongside my husband from his cancer diagnosis in May 2008 to his chemo and radiation treatments ending in February 2009 and now find myself immersed in a world I never thought I would be involved in. As his wife and supporter, I found that the most difficult thing during his cancer journey was not watching him in pain during his treatments or feeling out of control, but rather the abrupt change of lifestyle that we both had when he was diagnosed. I trusted that God was leading us into this time of uncertainty and frustration, but I didn’t like the fact that it took us away from our small, tight-knit community and thrust us into a new-to-us (as a newly married couple) environment where we weren’t sure how to engage with others under our new circumstances. I also struggled with the fact that there were days when I simply could not encourage my husband or cheer him up as much I wanted to yet truly believed that there was a purpose in our suffering. But we’re all meant to live our own stories, even in a marriage, and in time I soon became encouraged as I watched the plan of leading a kayaking trip with survivors begin to take shape in Mikey’s mind and watched his countenance begin to shine again.

Marrying Mikey, I knew that our life would be an adventure, but I never could have anticipated joining him on so many unexpected adventures. It is my absolute joy to share life with him and helping him plan this trip was a no-brainer for me; we work as a team! And just as we “expected,” it was nothing like we expected! To be honest, we thought the side-effects of some of the survivors’ treatments would make the trip much harder for them, but they did incredible and blew our expectations out of the water, even though there were aspects they still found difficult. Looking back now, I realize that I didn’t expect people to be so engaged and willing to share on the trip either, but no matter how late it was or how tough the day had just been, they entered into discussions with intention and took everything in stride when there were physical hurdles on the river.

One of my favorite aspects of the trip occurred at the end of each day, after we’d made camp, changed into dry clothes, and devoured dinner, when we the group shared their “highs” and “lows” of the day. Often the responses were extremely positive (sometimes despite that day’s difficulties), and even when people shared about the hard moments of their days their “highs” often trumped their low points. I loved hearing people say that they felt supported, or their breath was taken away by the scenery, or they were terrified of flipping but once it happened they were okay. This was a great ritual to end each day and I’m still struck with how awake, lively, and cheery people were even at the end of those long days.

Today I am floored by what this group of survivors has overcome, what they have taken back into their lives, how they have made such an impact on my life. They are true friends, and I am honored to have shared this experience with them. This trip reinforced to me what a group of people can do when they are intentional, purposeful, giving, and unified in their mindsets. It also revealed to me how powerful God as we watched him work daily on the river and in our lives, and how dependent we were on him for the entire trip (and continue to be day in and day out back home). I was deeply impacted by this trip and think fondly of it very often even today.